i won't give up

we are having another BOY! we've known this for about two months now, but it was just confirmed at our 20 week ultrasound. we couldn't be more thrilled at giving the boys another brother.

i realize i haven't written too much about this pregnancy or the baby or my thoughts on #3. why? well, because there are days when i feel like super mom. when i take the boys to the park and i remember to bring water and snacks. when i make dinner and do the dishes and give at least one of them a bath and read a book! and days when i'm patient and i'm cool and i'm fun. and we dance. and i think adding a third sounds like a lot of fun. and why wouldn't it be? i've got this whole mom thing down.

and then there are other days, when i'm overwhelmed. and i forget to bring diapers to daycare. and my kids are dirty and they need their nails cut. and if crosby hits jack one more time...and i'm angry. and we eat frozen pizza. and instead of reading books and playing, i sit on the couch and work before bedtime so i can watch X Factor in peace later that night. and the thought of a third makes my head spin and sends me into a panic attack that i'm afraid i'll never get out of. 

steve and i have always wanted a third child. we just kind of figured it would be down the road a couple of years and through adoption. we had just begun talking about becoming foster parents when we found out i was pregnant. after a two day shock period and a few pregnancy tests later, we were thrilled. felt so blessed to be adding to our family in this way. and we still do.

but are definitely considering some permanent birth control options...

if i should fall behind

three years ago, steven and i stood in front of a judge and vowed to be together forever. and then had buffalo wild wings for lunch. it was a perfect day.

in some ways, three years doesn't seem like a very long time. i mean, we still have at least 50 years to go (Lord willing)! but on the other hand, three years seems like a miracle. really, everyday is a miracle. high five.

steven, i love you. thank you for being stable when i'm not. thank you for introducing me to things like corn dogs, indianapolis, josh garrels, and heroes. thank you taking out the trash and putting my license plate on. thank you for telling stories and snuggling the boys. thank you for always bringing home surprises. thank you for praying for our family and those around us. thanks for cleaning up dog poop. thanks for making me laugh and watching x factor with me. i love you so much. i wouldn't be me without you.

"we said we'd walk together, baby, come what may
that come the twilight should we lose our way
if as we're walking a hand should slip free
i'll wait for you
and should i fall behind
wait for me

we swore we'd travel, darling, side by side
we'd help each other stay in stride
but each lovers steps fall so differently
but i'll wait for you
and should i fall behind 
wait for me"

bruce springsteen

a change would do you good

i realize i haven't posted any pictures of the inside of the house since we moved in four months ago. but 1) the house is never clean. with four adults, two children, and now a dog living here, the house is never photo ready. a photo would just show clutter. and 2) since moving in we really haven't done a lot in terms of decorating. we bought a couple rugs, hung a couple prints, and that's been about it. 

but now that we've lived here awhile, we've been brainstorming about small things we could do to make this home more homey. and so i give you our very first DIY project.

well, it's not really our first. steven and his dad built an attic in the garage the first weekend we moved in. and steven helped the contractor build our privacy fence since he was short handed. but this was our first decorating project and our first project together. i use the term "together" loosely since steven did all the work.

(please excuse the poor photography, randomly placed pictures, and blankets all over the floor. oh, and that big pile of maternity clothes in the corner. this is why we haven't posted pictures of the inside of the house!)

i bought our bedroom set before we were married. initially i loved it, but the more you live with something, the more you find things to not like about it (minus husbands and children). plus, steve has had to build it and take it apart more than once. so it looks really rough after a few moves.

what we hate the most is the headboard. it's hard to see, but it's a bookshelf. you can't lean against it and things always fall underneath it and it's impossible to get them out.
 

i found some inspiration on pinterest for a cheap, DIY headboard and steve loved it. so he went to work. 

 

we bought some wooden boards from home depot, steve cut them, stained them, and hung them. added some end tables and done! the room looks amazing.

the pictures don't do it justice, but it really adds so much to the room. we are absolutely in love with it! and watching your husband go to work on something for you...well that's just sexy.

next up on the home project list? good grief. we have a lot to do before this baby comes. empty the storage closet. move the playroom to the storage closet. move austin and josh to the playroom. move croz and jack to the big room. make a nursery in the smaller room. phew! and somehow making a headboard seemed to be the most logical thing to get done this weekend....oh well. we've got time, right?

slow down baby

crosby got his first haircut last weekend. partly because in a few months, he will no longer be the baby. partly because he had a mullet.

 (check out those curls!)

i found the best way to get a baby to sit for a haircut is to give him a sucker. works like a charm. so what if he eats a little hair in the process? small price to pay for a quiet child and a straight haircut.

it was sad. in the best way possible. our baby is growing up.

 (this is just too precious. it had to be included.)

he looks older. and so sweet in this picture. now if only his behavior would match it....

animal

we got a dog. which, if you know us at all, is a much bigger shock than us being pregnant with #3. (which really isn't a shock at all knowing our history...). steven and i aren't really dog people. we aren't animal people. we're people people. but...

we live in the kind of neighborhood where your rocking chair gets stolen off your porch and you find it at the thrift store the next week. the kind of neighborhood where the police do roll call on the corner once a week. the kind of neighborhood where you might want a big ol' dog by your side when you're walking to bus stop.

enter george. a 13 week old english mastiff. like most of the decisions steven and i make, we discuss, decide, then do. all in about a weeks time. it didn't take long for steven to convince me that a dog was a good idea and that a mastiff was the right breed for us. they are protective but not aggressive. and notoriously low maintenance. (really, george just lays around all day. but don't tell the neighbors.)

 
george is big. and will be over 200 lb. by the time he is full grown. and truthfully, that's all we need. something that looks scary. i've seen it work too. people cross to the other side of the street before passing us. and he's only 46 lbs. right now! steve is doing his part to keep the fear in the neighborhood alive, too. on a walk one night, a little girl asked, "will he bite me?" and steve responded with, "i wouldn't put my hand near his mouth."

there have been more than a few times that i've been glad to have him. i was walking to the bus stop the other day to pick up j and this man kept muggin' me. (we live in the hood now so i'm going to start saying things like "muggin" and...well i'm not sure what else people say in the hood, but i'll tell you in a few months). without george, i'm not sure i would have felt quite as safe. 

no, he is not a "fur baby". he is a dog. he is not a member of the family. he is a pet. i promise we won't become crazy animal people and expect everyone to like to our dog. promise.