so sick

steve woke up a couple weeks ago at 1 am in crazy pain. pain like i have never seen him in before. austin took him to the er and he was told he had a kidney stone.  after four hours, he was able to come home. luckily he passed it quickly, but was wiped out for a couple days afterwards.

these past 7 months have been rough for us...physically, medically, and then because of all of that...financially. since january, crosby has had four ear infections, pink eye, and strep throat. jack had a fluke allergic reaction (we think it was from pine). i've had strep throat. steve had bronchitis and an upper respitory infection and now a kidney stone. and for reasons too long for me to explain here, we have really shitty health insurance. the kind of health insurance that leaves us paying $400 towards a well child visit. the bills are piling up. between rearranging work schedules, caring for sick kids, and figuring out how we're going to pay the bills, i'm feeling defeated. i think to myself (or outloud to my mom), "does it ever end?" and i guess it doesn't. it's life. and i get that. but i'm feeling weighed down. feeling like we could use a break. some time to catch up.

we're going to be friends

holy shit. my little j bird went to kindergarten today. and wore a uniform. and marched right up on that bus like he was made for it.

 (walking to the bus stop)

and it's crazy. not because i didn't think he'd make it to five or ever make it to kindergarten. but because i didn't think we'd ever be here. married. a family. with j having a little brother and another on the way. in a house. that we own. and we love.

when i was pregnant with j, i couldn't stop thinking about the door he would walk up to after school (that and how i was going to pay for braces). it's irrational and stupid and meaningless, i know, but i was pregnant and hormonal. i didn't think i'd ever be able to provide this - a home, a family, and a really cute front door.

 

(looking for the bus. these are not staged. promise.)

how blessed i feel that we moved into this house (with an adorable front door) just two months before our j man headed off to school for the very first time. is this about kindergarten or our home? i'm not really sure. but it doesn't matter because it was all important to me today.  

first thing he said after getting off the bus, "it was awesome."

family portrait

thanks to my sister in law, jess, we had some family pictures taken for the first time ever this summer. here are some of my favorites:

 
and my most favorite of all:

ass back home

my sister and her family moved to France in january. (follow their adventure HERE). they will be there for over two years. which is devastating for me, beyond exciting for them. my sister is one of my best friends. ava is one of jack's best friends. we miss them terribly everyday.

thankfully, the whole country of France pretty much shuts down in august. i have no idea why and i don't really care. all i know is that tracy and her precious children are in the US for six weeks and we were able to meet up with them last weekend in chicago.

family weekends at my mom's are chaos and we love it! too many kids, too many people, too much food. it's amazing. there is nothing that makes me happier than being all together.

 (a and j picked up right where they left off!!)

 (love that they are pulling the same face!)

 (donuts for breakfast)

 

we were able to meet up with the groots one night for live music, splash park, and food! hands down one of the best nights of the summer.

 

 (these two...)

 (got him to sit still for a second!)

(one of the happiest babies i know!)

it may have been one of the best weekends of the entire summer. and we get to do it all again in two weeks, except then the workmans will be able to join us, too!!!! i'll get to meet my niece, emma. everyone will be under one roof. something that won't happen for another year....but first fun, then sadness. and maybe i'll just run out of the house and not say goodbye to anyone like i did at Christmas. that was actually pretty effective.  

 

 

 (the weekend just would not have been the same without uncle matt & auntie heather)